Anyone who has landed on my blog can probably imagine leaving their home country. In this article I want to share with you why moving to a new country might not always be the best idea. It might seem like I want to discourage people from experiencing life abroad or starting fresh in a new place, but that’s not the case. If you read this article to the end, you’ll understand that moving to a new country should only happen if it genuinely improves your life. You should be happier and never regret your decision.
It doesn’t matter where you’re from or where you’d like to go. If you find yourself in any of these five situations, moving abroad might not be the right choice for you.
You’re Running Away from Something
It happens to many people who decide to move to a new country. They quit their job, sell all the things they can’t take with them, and announce to their family that they are leaving. They try to convince themselves that it’s to have a better life. But that’s not the case. It’s because something has happened in their life that they no longer want to endure. Their long-term relationship has ended, they no longer enjoy their job, they have a boring life, they feel misunderstood… The reasons can be many, but often they are not reasons to move abroad.
My advice to these people would be to try to change something. Quit your job, find a new hobby, move to another city in your country, try traveling for longer than usual. These are some ways to escape a stereotypical life. Let me tell you something you would figure out yourself after a few months abroad. Nothing would change. Your past life at home and your new life abroad have one thing in common: you. If you don’t change, nothing changes.
I think I belonged to this category of people who want to run away. However, I was lucky that I didn’t move. I’m not going to pretend I’m amazing and others aren’t. I didn’t move because I didn’t have enough money and I lost my courage. I didn’t want to risk cleaning toilets in Finland for the first year just to pay my bills. If you want to read my full story, you can find it in the article: How I Didn’t Move to Finland.
How did it all end? I quit my job, ended my apartment lease, and found a new apartment and job in another city, just 200 kilometers away from my original city. Everything changed. Even if I still have days when I’m not happy with my life, but now it’s much better than it was. I have a better-paying job that I enjoy. I live in a city with better job opportunities and a higher quality of life. Think about it if you’re unhappy with your life and want to run away from everything.
You Have Strong Ties to Your Family
Can you imagine seeing your parents in person only once a year? You’d certainly miss many family celebrations, your friends’ birthday parties, and countless other experiences you’d love to be part of. The decision to move away will undoubtedly change your life. Like every major decision, this one also comes with its pros and cons. If there’s no one around to take care of you, you’ll have to take care of yourself. Nowadays, maintaining family relationships remotely is much easier thanks to the internet, but even that can’t replace the closeness of family. This was the second reason why moving to a new country might not be the best idea.
You Need Regular Social Interaction with Friends
Moving abroad means you’ll have to build your social life from scratch. You won’t have your closest friends or former classmates around because they all stayed back home. When you were younger, it wasn’t so hard to make friends because you shared similar interests. Whether you were classmates, neighbors, or teammates, you always had something in common. In a new country, you’ll be different from everyone else. You won’t have anything in common with most people. The only ones you might relate to will be other expats. That’s why most of your acquaintances in a new country will likely come from other countries as well.
However, it will take time to build a new circle of friends and acquaintances. This can be especially challenging in countries like Finland, in my opinion. Finns aren’t the kind of people who welcome foreigners with open arms. They tend to be more reserved, and it takes longer for them to let you into their lives.
Another factor that makes loneliness in Finland particularly challenging is the weather. The darkness and unpleasant weather can take a toll on anyone’s mental health if they’re not prepared for it.
One of the best ways to make friends as quickly as possible in a new country is by learning the language. Not only will the locals stop perceiving you as a foreigner, but you’ll also meet many expats in language courses who are dealing with the same challenges as you. They’ll likely be happy to share advice. And this is exactly how friendships are formed—by overcoming problems together and discussing shared experiences.
You’re Motivated Only by a Higher Salary
Moving abroad solely for a higher salary can often lead to dissatisfaction and unexpected challenges. While financial gain may seem like an appealing reason, it fails to address other critical aspects of living in a new country. For instance, adapting to a different culture, language, and lifestyle can be overwhelming, especially if you are not prepared. The excitement of earning more can quickly fade when faced with feelings of isolation, homesickness, or difficulty integrating into a new social environment. Without a deeper motivation or purpose, such as personal growth, professional development, or a passion for the new country, the financial incentive may not be enough to sustain long-term happiness.
Moreover, a higher salary often comes with hidden costs. Living expenses in wealthier countries, such as housing, healthcare, and transportation, can be significantly higher, reducing the impact of the increased income. Additionally, moving abroad can mean being far from family and friends, leading to emotional struggles that money cannot compensate for. The lack of a strong support system can affect mental health and make it harder to deal with the challenges of living in a foreign land. Thus, while the prospect of a better salary may seem attractive, it is essential to consider the broader implications and ensure that the decision aligns with your personal values and long-term goals.
Your Partner Is Moving Only Because of You
Moving abroad when your partner is accompanying you solely because of your decision can create significant challenges in your relationship. While it may seem like a gesture of love and support, it often puts immense pressure on both individuals. Your partner might struggle to find their own sense of purpose in the new country, especially if they have left behind a fulfilling career, close friends, or family. The imbalance in motivation can lead to feelings of resentment or dissatisfaction, as they might feel that they sacrificed more for the move than you did. Over time, this dynamic can strain your relationship and make it harder to adapt to the new environment together.
Additionally, your partner’s unhappiness or lack of fulfillment in the new country can negatively impact your experience as well. If he or she struggle to find a job, build a social circle, or adapt to the new culture, his or her frustration may spill over into your daily life. You may feel guilty for uprooting their life, while they might feel stuck in a place they didn’t truly want to be. This can lead to conflicts and emotional distance, making it difficult to maintain a healthy and balanced partnership. Moving abroad is a major decision that requires both individuals to be equally invested and aligned in their goals to ensure a successful and fulfilling transition.
Life abroad can be wonderful, but it’s not for everyone. If you’re considering such a move, make sure it’s for the right reasons and that you’re prepared for the challenges that come with it.
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